6(ish) books I’ve re-read and re-read and re-read....

I love to read. 

If you have ever helped me move, you know how many of my boxes are very heavy because they are just completely full of books. Since moving to New York I have moved a little bit toward the ebook era (but don't ask me how much it kills me, because that could be a blog post all on its own), but I am still addicted to reading. I'm venturing into new books this summer, starting with Velvet Elvis, by Rob Bell, which I'm almost done with and have really found beneficial and thought provoking. I'm also looking for other suggestions on good books you've read that have challenged you, or helped you in your journey through life, so let me know!

However, there are some books that I always return to. Books that I have multiple copies of, and reread almost annually. And I thought I would share those with you. Although they are all fiction, I'm not ashamed. I think fiction is a great way to make people think about different worlds and different perspectives on life! (Disclaimer: I didn't include the Bible. Though that is the most read book of my life, and I am in it most days, I'm just not including it. Sorry)


1. The Giver, by Lois Lowry. This is my absolute favorite book. The first time I heard this book was in 3rd grade. It's not too long, and easy reading, but SUCH a great story! It was assigned reading 4 times during my school years, and I LOVED seeing it on a syllabus. I literally own at least 5 copies of it. 2 Hard Copies, 2 soft backs and one Ebook. I love Jonas, and Gabe, and The Giver, and their relationships. I love the entire Dynamic of Dystopian novels (which you'll see as you read through this list). In a world where everything is supposed to be "perfect" you learn that life can never be perfect, and without choice you miss out on the best parts of the craziness that is life. And as a bonus... she wrote 3 sequels! Good sequels too, and while I also love all of them, the original is the one I always go back to.

2. Harry Potter Series, by J.K. Rowling. Yep, couldn't really pick one. The whole series is amazing. I wanted to say that the newer ones are better, but when I recently started re-reading The Sorcerer's Stone again, I realized that the writing is god throughout them all. I'm just older, and relate better now to the older story lines. I think most people around my age will put this on their list. We grew up with Harry Potter, and his world became our world. And regardless of what you want to say about her, Rowling is a great writer. She makes things seem like they could be real. She makes you get deeply invested in the characters. When Order of the Phoenix came out, I literally kept getting in trouble at school for reading instead of paying attention. I'm glad the majority of Christians got over the initial "burn the witchcraft books" reaction, and as my 5th grade sister begins to read through these books, I'm excited for her journey! (My least favorite is Chamber of Secrets, I don't even know why, I just know that it is.)

Even Dr. Horrible reads Harry Potter. For some reason he has 2 copies of books 6 and 7.
Probably because the first copies are too blurry from all his tears...

3. Brave New World, by Aldous Huxley. Another Dystopian novel, and my favorite of the old classic dystopians (close behind being 1984 and Fahrenheit 451). The details Huxley gives on the conditioning and creation of people in his world are so vivid and disturbing. John, The Savage, trying to interact in a world completely alien than his own. Linina, trying to fit into what society tells her, while fighting passions that go against them. And poor Marx. The Shakespeare that is twined into the story is genius, and though sometimes the writing style is a little unusual, it's still amazing. Read it at least once in your life!

4. Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austin. I want to name my first child Elizabeth. That's how much I love this book. And yes, I love the Mr. Darcy Love Story, because who wouldn't? But that's not the reason I reread this book, because it is much easier to just rewatch the movie (which I admit I do watch quite often). The reason I love the book is how universal it is. Austin wrote this book in 1813! 200 years ago!! Yet I can still read it and relate. Her characters are real people. They have actual and full personalities. Faulty personalities. The annoying, frustrating, stupid things that are the essence of humanity. And so I can be Elizabeth, with her stubbornness and getting lost in a boy she doesn't even know yet. And I can be Jane with her naivety, and her shyness. I can be Lydia, and make awful mistakes, and act like I am completely in the right. (Yes, it pains me to see Lydia in myself, but truth is truth.) And obviously mostly it's Elizabeth's journey and I just love how she handles things (positives and negatives). I realize that boys may not enjoy this book, and probably rightly so. But luckily I'm a girl, and I will love this book forever.

5. Hunger Games Series by Suzanne Collins. I know what you're thinking. Well, too bad, it's my list not yours. It's the dystopian novel thing again. I love them. And as much as Katniss annoys me, I like the extreme that Collins takes this world. They have had a realty show of kids killing each other for 75 years... And even as annoyed as I get with Katniss, she is a girl with a LOT of problems. Shouldn't we be more worried about the people from District 1 and 2 that aren't phased by the fact that they are about to kill and/or be killed by a bunch of other kids? I think the government system is very interesting, similarly to why I like Brave New World, and President Snow is much more of a conniving character than he is in the movie. There are many books that are close to this that I also love (Divergent Series, The Selection Series, Matched Series, Uglies Series) but for sure Hunger Games is my favorite. Granted, 3 of those series haven't put out the third book yet, so it might change by next year!

6. Lucky Me, by Lisa Fiedler. You haven't heard of this book. This is my book with my best friend, Chariane. We found it in our school library in 6th grade and took turns checking it out. We used to call each other and read it to the other at night. Take turns reading it alone. Talk about it all the time. And then, at the end of 8th grade, I stole it from my school's library. (And I say stole, but I had to pay for it, so it wasn't really stealing). Even though we are adults now, we still love the book. It's about a girl "coming to age", dealing with liking boys for the first time... first co-ed parties... dealing with crazy friends... pretty much all the stuff we were going through in middle school. (We also found out in High School that Lucky Me is a sequel, and we hunted down the original book and devoured it as well, though it was not as good). I even quoted the book in my Maid-of-Honor speech at her wedding. So obviously this is a sentimental book, and I wouldn't recommend it for probably anyone. haha.

So there you go. My favs. Any fiction books (especially dysptopian) that you think I'll like based on these 6 books, shoot 'em my way.

Um... someone made this bracelet specifically thinking about me, I think.
If you want to buy it for me, you can find it on etsy! hahaha

(Special shout out to Shannan Volters, one of my very best friends, who I totally stole this blog post idea from. Go check out her 5 books, and the rest of her blog at: http://shannanwithanalife.wordpress.com/2013/05/29/5ish-books-ive-re-read-not-including-the-bible/)

It is SUMMER... or... Prioritizing my Life

Summer is here. Hallelujah. Praise the Tetragrammaton!! But now that I have extra time, I am determined to use it for the best purposes. So here are my 3 priorities this summer:

1st: BEING OUTSIDE. I love being outside, but I rarely find myself there. I may be in a city, but this city has a ton of amazing parks, not to mention the amount of outdoor seating at all the cafes and restaurants. So, any chance I have to be outside, I'm taking it. Not to mention I need to get back into running, which is accomplished much better outside than inside.

2nd: READING. Not just fiction. Though I will also be reading fiction, I want to read theological books. From different perspectives, challenging me to think differently, and helping me sort out exactly where I stand on many different issues. In keeping with this, if you have any books you think will give me an interesting or new perspective (particularly any book that really impacted your worldview) please let me borrow it. Knowledge lies in books, even if wisdom doesn't accompany all, and I am thirsty for knowledge.

3rd: GOD. Don't think my priorities are out of order, because I did in fact leave the best for last. This summer is going to hold some big things. Big decisions, Big news, Big changes. And as I face those I want to be sure I am clinging to Jesus. Jesus is the most important person in my life, and I so often put him last in my schedule. That needs to change, and I will start this summer. From now on He comes first. Reading the Bible, prayer, service, and mainly just listening. I don't just spend time listening nearly enough. God has things to tell me, I know as much, it's time to open my ears.

And while I'm not making this a priority, I also plan on having fun this summer. I think it will be a natural bi-product of reordering my priorities, as well as spending time with some great friends (Can anyone say SETTLERS OF CATAN??) and working on some of my creative endeavors (writing, photography, video, etc.). All in all I think this will be a great summer.

I hope it will be for you as well.

To be or not to be... I asked myself the question

I am an optimist.

I know you didn’t ask, but they told me you should write what you know. Though lately it seems like I don’t know anything. That seems like a strange thing to say coming from someone claiming to be an optimist, but it’s true.

Part of my optimism comes from being slightly naive. It’s not that I’m too stupid to see what is in front of me, it’s just that I really want to see the good in people. I want to believe that no one is out to hurt anyone. I want to believe that when you fall in love with someone, they won’t exploit that love. I want to believe that what you see is what you get. But I know that’s not what happens. People lie and people cheat. People tell you exactly what they know you want to hear, so they can get exactly what they want out of you.

Now you’re thinking, this girl is not an optimist. But I am. However, I am also a realist. I know that what I want from the world is almost never what I’m going to get. The last time I was faced with this realization in my life I almost gave up my optimism. I thought, “Why should I keep trusting people? Why hope for the best? Why be vulnerable?”

Then I heard a wonderful TED talk by Brene Brown. She reminded me that having the courage to be yourself is the only way you can be happy. And so I can’t give up on who I am. And who I am is a person who gives people the benefit of the doubt. I think that people can change. I think that people can think of others over themselves.

I know that this is going to lead to more heartbreak, but I refuse to go into every new situation assuming that it’s all a lie. Now, will I be more guarded? Of course!

I’m sure you’ve heard someone use the very popular phrase, “Forgive and Forget”. Well, I hate that phrase. Yes, optimists can hate things, I Googled it. Should you forgive someone when they hurt you? YES! It’s a healing process. It helps you understand that it’s over and you can start to move on. Should you forget? Hell no. If we forget the bad things that happen to us, what keeps us from being hurt again?

I know that there’s a fine line between putting yourself out there and guarding yourself. But I intend to ride the line, as hard as it may get. Lucky for me, I’m an optimist, so I think in that the end, things will work out.

Student Ministry in New York City!

This has been a whirlwind of a month. Blogging has been down due to the crazy busyness that had taken over my life. But, it has led to some wonderful events, one of which I would love to highlight here: INSOMNIA.

INSOMNIA was an All-Night event for the Middle and High School students at Forefront Church (both Brooklyn and Manhattan). OK, to be real, they are all Manhattan students, because the oldest child we have at Brooklyn so far is 5. Ha ha. But one day!!

We played so many great games, and the kids and adults had a blast! One of the games we played was "Photobooth Challenge." The 2 teams were given a box of props, 2 hours and a list of photo and video prompts. Here is some of what came out of that:

"World Peace"

"It's a Small World After All"

"Taste the Rainbow"

"Addicted to Technology"

"INSOMNIA"

"Disney Movie"

"Instagram"

"ET"

I couldn't believe some of the things these kids came up with. And the leader participation was hilarious!

I specifically enjoyed teaching the students my favorite big group game: Murderer in the Dark! You have everyone draw a card, and whoever gets the Ace is the murderer. Then you turn off all the lights and try not to get "killed". The students enjoyed it so much that we ended up playing for almost 3 hours! I will say I very much liked the round when I was the murderer and won by killing everyone!! ha ha. (Yeah, this doesn't sound very church-y does it!) We also played some other classic Youth Group games: Steal the Bacon, Ga-Ga Ball, Signs and Extreme Spoons!

It has been such a blast working with the Student Ministry out here in New York. I keep telling people this, but I think these kids are the best mannered teenagers I have ever met. They are always trying to help people not feel left out, They listen to their leaders, and they are generally happy and not moody! Granted we only see them one, maybe 2, times a week. So their parents may have other things to say!

Reflections

In light of the last couple weeks, I have been doing some reflecting. Reflecting on my life and my journey and most importantly my relationship with God.
Living in New York City is nothing like living anywhere else in the world, and I am completely convinced that the cliche "If I can make it there, I can make it anywhere" is completely true. It isn't an easy place to live. Your schedule is completely crazy, and travel time is not only twice as long, but twice as awful as normal cities. Parties start after 8pm, showing up before 9 is bad form, and showing up after midnight is completely acceptable. As you walk through the streets, especially in Manhattan, you can see that you are completely surrounded by people, yet you can feel so alone. This city is exhausting and clinging to some type of stability here is intoxicating. Something to keep you grounded, keep you from being lonely. It comes out in different ways for different people. Some throw themselves into the social scene drowning themselves in interactions to keep from having to think about the loneliness. Others delve completely into their art, pretending that the loneliness fuels them. And then there are those who direct all their attention into a relationship, hoping to fill in the gaps in a more simple and intimate way.

I have been faced with a lot of new experiences and knowledge since arriving in this city. Things that have changed me and that continues to shape the woman I am becoming in my relationship with Jesus and my life as a Christian. Things that challenge me, and push me, and make me wonder how much of what I think I knew came from my own intellectual examinations, and what I let get put in me through sources I never thought to question.

For those of you starting to worry about my salvation, don't. Through everything one thing has remained constant: my complete faith that Jesus is my Savior, that he died for my sins, and that His free gift of Grace is in my life. The complete confidence I have in that comforts me.

So maybe I seem to be in two places during this post, so allow me to tie them together, and explain why I am even sharing this today. I am on a journey. A journey that won't be done anytime soon, and will probably last my whole life. I believe that the loneliness of this city can be cured, and I believe that Jesus is the cure. I know that sounds cheesy, but I'm OK with that. I think there is a missing piece to this puzzle of Jesus, and I am determined to try to figure it out. And I know that I am in a community here at Forefront (both in Manhattan and Brooklyn) that is on the same journey. A journey to discover how the Church can truly know God's love and show it to others. How can my life be aimed toward showing the true love of Jesus? How can I even know what the true love of Jesus looks like?  I may be facing many questions about what being a Christian means, and what showing Jesus' love looks like, but the one thing I do know is that once we accept Jesus as Savior, we are free. And I believe that in that freedom, Jesus wants us to be able to search for our own answers.

New York is an amazing city and when you let yourself be a part of it, instead of trying to grasp onto what life was before, it will change you. And it may be a scary change, and it may feel uncomfortable, but I believe it can change you For Good.

Starting anew in 2013

Let's try this again, shall we?

Last Summer I moved to New York City for a one year Children's Ministry Internship. If you read the blog posts from the beginning of the last summer, you know it immediately started out crazy. Well, it only got crazier. I went from being an intern at an Upper West Side Manhattan Church, to being the Children's Minister at a new church plant in Brooklyn. Needless to say, my life got extremely busy as we planned for the church's opening in September. The Launch of this new Forefront Church in Brooklyn went incredibly. I have made so many new friends, and the people here really feel like family now. I mean we even weathered through a Hurricane together! Now that life has calmed down slightly (yes, emphasis on slightly), I decided to restart this blog, so that I can share my life, both the ups and the downs, with my friends and family around the world.

Baby Dedications at Forefront Church in Brooklyn, NY

So, as this new year begins I want to share a special event that happened at church this weekend. We had our first Baptisms and Baby Dedications. First 3 families (with 4 kids altogether), dedicated themselves to raising their children in God's love. It was amazing to get to be a part of that experience for my first time, and come alongside these families in promising to share God's love and grace with their children. Then 2 beautiful women, and friends of mine, Aimee and Stef, were Baptized. Their stories were touching, and their tears joyous, as they made their commitment declarations for our Savior, Jesus. Sunday was truly a blessing for the Forefront Community.

This year is going to be full of joy and happiness, but the Lord knows it will also be full of heartache and sorrow. I invite you all to follow along with me, pray for and with me, and see what is in store for this Children's Minister in Brooklyn, NY. I predict this will be one wild roller coaster of a year.

Week 4 - Recap

Week four (6/24-6/30/12) was a pretty epic week.

It started with our first Forefront BROOKLYN campus Preview Service. The full Brooklyn Campus will be opening in September, but to generate interest and get our name into the community. We are also having a lot of community building events throughout the summer as well. I got to help set up the Children's Ministry for the church, including getting the necessarily equipment and setting up the room. A lovely volunteer, Heather, and I got the lesson ready and we had a great time with the kids, teaching them about Noah's Ark. It was great because I really felt in tune with my mission to reach kids in the New York/Brooklyn area. Best service yet!

A really awesome CRAZY thing was that one of the girls, Co-Co, who was in my Sunday School class back in Joplin was there!! Her dad works for the church planting company that helped plant Forefront (they also help plant churches all over the world) and the whole family is in New York for the summer!!

After church Michelle and I went to explore SoHo. It was fun, though there weren't enough SoHo Hipster stuff for Michelle! Although I did find a SUPER hipster shop that sold One Piece Shirts! (One Piece is a Japanese Anime that my best friend, Brandon, and I love). I think it's hilarious because it is the cool thing to do now is to wear Anime and Geek clothing, even if you don't know what it is. But hey, I'm not going to dis it, because it means I have access to A LOT more geek clothes than I normally would!

Michelle took me to the very corner of China Town, since I hadn't been there yet. She wanted me to get to see one of the "Purse Guys". It was SO sketch!! (fyi - 'sketch' is a slang word used to describe something that is on the brink of being scary/dangerous/generally bad) Michelle went up to the man with a big bag, which was just a sheet, obviously filled with purses. She asked to look at them. But then we saw police lights, and he was like, "Hold on". I looked down the street toward the cop car. The street looked pretty normal. The cop car pulled away, and Michelle told me to look again, and in those 2 second I wasn't looking the entire sidewalk filled up with the men with big sheet bags! It was crazy.

Michelle, Lili and I went to get Frozen
Yougurt on a STICK!

After the dip into China Town we met up with Lili and went to eat a late lunch in Little Italy. I LOVE Little Italy. It is so cute! Just a long road completely dedicated to truly Italian restaurants. We picked a cute place that we noticed gave out free bread (we are college kids after all). It was very yummy. Then Kait called and we decided to go to the Newsies to put out name in the Lottery. Broadway Lottery's are awesome. You put your name in a bowl, and they draw out about 20 names and each person gets to buy 2 $30 tickets! Way cheaper than normal ticket prices! Sad news is that when we got there, they weren't doing another lottery. So we decided to Google what was going on for free.

We ended up going to wait 5 hours to see a free showing of the Upright Citizens Brigade, an improv show that usually has NBC stars there, specifically Saturday Night Live stars. We had a lot of fun in line. We played an intense game of Spades, and got to know a girl sitting near us in line. The show was worth the wait, though there were no SNL people there that night. There was however 2 people from 30 Rock and 1 from Community, plus my personal favorite Lennon Parham one of the writers and stars of Best Friends Forever, which sadly got canceled!


That week I got to go to dinner with my Aunt Missy who was in town, my cousin's Alix and Jordan and Alix's sister and boyfriend. It was a really great night! It's still crazy that I live in the same city as 3 of my cousins! I wish we got to see each other more often!! And I hadn't seen my Aunt for like 10 years! She lives not too far, so I can foresee a road trip with Alix, Sam and Jordan out there!


That week at work was really fun. I got to organize a middle/high school overnighter, which we called INSOMNIA. So I spent most of the work week getting the games ready and buying supplies! It was fun. Michelle and I went all around the city getting very random things, which you can see from our shopping list! It was a work intensive week, but that was what I needed. I like working! I particularly love the view I have when I go to the Tea Shop right next to the office to work. I love New York!

This week ended with a Family Picnic/Field Day in Prospect Park for the Brooklyn families of Forefront. Heather and I organized a LOT of games for the kids, and we only ended up having 3! But they sure got spoiled! I painted all of their faces, and had time to be very detailed on the Butterfly, Cat and Bunny! It was a beautiful day and a lot of adults came. We played games, and everyone had brought their dogs. My landlords, Mike and Mira, brought Adam, their German Shepard. He is so much fun!!