I know you didn’t ask, but they told me you should write what you know. Though lately it seems like I don’t know anything. That seems like a strange thing to say coming from someone claiming to be an optimist, but it’s true.
Part of my optimism comes from being slightly naive. It’s not that I’m too stupid to see what is in front of me, it’s just that I really want to see the good in people. I want to believe that no one is out to hurt anyone. I want to believe that when you fall in love with someone, they won’t exploit that love. I want to believe that what you see is what you get. But I know that’s not what happens. People lie and people cheat. People tell you exactly what they know you want to hear, so they can get exactly what they want out of you.
Now you’re thinking, this girl is not an optimist. But I am. However, I am also a realist. I know that what I want from the world is almost never what I’m going to get. The last time I was faced with this realization in my life I almost gave up my optimism. I thought, “Why should I keep trusting people? Why hope for the best? Why be vulnerable?”
Then I heard a wonderful TED talk by Brene Brown. She reminded me that having the courage to be yourself is the only way you can be happy. And so I can’t give up on who I am. And who I am is a person who gives people the benefit of the doubt. I think that people can change. I think that people can think of others over themselves.
I know that this is going to lead to more heartbreak, but I refuse to go into every new situation assuming that it’s all a lie. Now, will I be more guarded? Of course!
I’m sure you’ve heard someone use the very popular phrase, “Forgive and Forget”. Well, I hate that phrase. Yes, optimists can hate things, I Googled it. Should you forgive someone when they hurt you? YES! It’s a healing process. It helps you understand that it’s over and you can start to move on. Should you forget? Hell no. If we forget the bad things that happen to us, what keeps us from being hurt again?
I know that there’s a fine line between putting yourself out there and guarding yourself. But I intend to ride the line, as hard as it may get. Lucky for me, I’m an optimist, so I think in that the end, things will work out.
